Magnificent Max At Nine Years Old

Mama, I’m Ten Times Stronger

Max has been a delight this summer. His days have been occupied with playing his IPod, watching his favorite show Lab Rats, Karate lessons, Special Olympics swim practice and preparing for his High Adventure trip to Mount Whitney. (Some days he practice the viola)

Weeks before his trip to Mount Whitney, we worked on what supplies he would need and how to pack it in his backpack. As we collected the items, I struggled with the idea of him going on the five day trip without a rehabilitation worker, but with prayer and faith, I knew he would be fine. Days before he left I spent restless nights concerned about him hiking a 14,000 elevation mountain with a 50lbs weighted backpack. Thoughts of how would he repack his sleeping bag, how would he remember to change his socks,
or take his medication? So many questions stirred my emotions.

Max needs daily prompts with applying deodorant, brushing his teeth and hair plus many other reminders throughout the day. I thought how is he ever going to make it, would he be a burden to the leaders and would he be able to keep up with the other scouts? Unsure how to deal with these uneasy feelings I put trust in the Lord that He would help me to push these negative questions out of my mind.

One negative thought that lingered and made me want to question Max on if he really wanted to go, but before I asked him, I felt a need to share with Max what this trip required of him. So, we watched videos of hikers on Mount Whitney. I explain that there would be lots of switch backs to hike while carrying his heavy backpack. He still answered with a smile on his face, “Mom I want to go, I want to do it.”

To do it was the question I wondered about, to hike without a rehabilitation worker? I spent hours with Max packing and repacking his backpack. I packed with optimism he would remember. After each drill of packing his backpack I thought about other teenagers his age, including my two older sons when they were teenagers and how they never needed my help packing. I told myself to stop comparing Max to others.

Sunday at church there were two scouts that spoke and shared the detail information of how the trip went. I focused on each word soaking in the detailed information that my son could not tell me. I asked Max what happened on the trip. He responded with, “Mom, I’m ten times stronger than I was before Mount Whitney and now I’m ready to serve a mission.” I loved his response, but wanted to hear what the hike was like, or did he see anything that was extraordinary. Did he have a hard time or problems sleeping? I did find from empting out his backpack that he forgot to take his allergy medication. He forgot to change his socks and clothes. He didn’t eat all the meals I put individual plastic bags. When he called the morning he was traveling home he said, “Mom the only part of my body I have washed is my hands with wipes.” He asked me to put him on speaker phone so he could talk to Malachi and share his experience of the week. He said, “Malachi, I know what it was like for you in Russia. I know what it’s like to walk in Siberia because I hiked in cold weather fifty miles and my hands got numb.” His voice was filled with excitement and joy that he had experience what his brother had on his two year mission to Siberia, Russia.

The blessing of this Mount Whitney trip was not only for Max, but for me. I learned that God does answer our prayers. He answered mine through two men in our church. These two men a father and son served with kindness to guide Max through the Mount Whitney experience. They were angels sent to give the added help that Max needed. As I reflect on how often I have doubted that the Lord hears my prayers, this trial of letting Max go helped me. It gave me an opportunity to trust in the Lord and not ever doubt that
He doesn’t hear my prayers.

Max is a happy go lucky young man, who lives with no guile or deceit. I look back on the toddler years and see how far he has come. There were times when he was young I never thought he would talk or be able to live the life he has lived. I never dreamed he would be the kind young man that he became. The aggressive behavior he had as a young boy has vanished from him.

For those who struggle with a young child who lives daily with Autism hold on, because the journey becomes priceless as the years roll forward. All the hours of speech, occupational, and music therapy have paid off and are still paying off. Never doubt, never doubt what your child who lives with autism can achieve, because I know they can achieve more than you will ever dream of.
 The key to success is prayer and faith in our Heavenly Father.

The father and son who helped Max told me a story about Max on the trip.

Here is what they said, “Max was using the restroom and when he came out he couldn’t find his backpack. He looked and looked for it and finally we told him someone took it. Max said Oh darn. We then told him we had taken it across the river and it was waiting for him. He never got upset or angry.
He was always happy.”

A quote from Max. "God made the mountains that I hiked on. The mountains are God's temple."

"Girls are more intelligent than boys."

At the dinner table Max shared with me and his father, that he believes girls are more intelligent than boys.

 I asked him how did he know that girls are more intelligent and he said,

 "Because the girls all got A's on their test in Seminary and the boys didn't." 

Happy Birthday Max!

Max had a wonderful 15 birthday.  His birthday was on a Sunday and we had all of the family come over to sing Happy Birthday to him. Here are some pictures from his birthday....

 A Birthday sign I put up for him. 

 I decorated his bedroom door the night before and when he woke up he was trapped. 

Happy Max. 

 

He is pure joy. 

Friday, February 20, 2015

Reason I have been not writing for while

It's not easy or a cake walk .I am having a hard time wondering where I shall go what I shall do and who  I should trust now. I have had homework after homework. Wondering if  God really loves me, the truth is God really loves me, because he wants me to grow strong and shine and be that jewel, under heat and pressure, to give me the power I need for the future .  "The world is better with God, then without God."

  "The power of love is more powerful than worldly possessions. " by Max

My grandfather said to my mom before he died "nothing means more to me than being sealed to your mother." I wonder if he would be proud with me, PS everyone stay tuned with my news in sites on what you need help with because its coming soon.

 Words from Max  

Max shared with me how he remembers my father seating on our couch and watching his oldest brother and his friends dance on a Sony play station dance pad and having fun. He said he remembers my father laughing and being happy. I am grateful he remembers something about my dad. Max was three years old during this time. Surprises me that Max remembers. 

Max's Thoughts and Great Accomplishments

 

 Max went on a scout camp-out and look what he brought home.

 His sister wants to buy this ram skull from him, but he wants to keep it.

Max experience playing basketball for the first time and he liked it, 

but said he still loves baseball more.

He said, "Basketball is boring because you go back and forth on the court. Baseball you get fresh air and the opportunity to use a bat. "

 

 Max practicing for the Special Olympics.

 Max has grown six inches in the past year. 

This picture is blurry, but it shows his high-waters tuxedo pants. We ordered these pants in August and this picture was taken in October.  Gives you an idea how he has shot up in height.

He went from a 32 inseam to a 34 in two months.

 Max after his concert. He is second chair in his orchestra. 

Max loved volunteering at Safeway bagging groceries for Special Olympics. 

He wants to get a job at Safeway.

 In December Max got sick...and needed an IV for dehydration. He was so afraid he was going to die.

Max was afraid the IV would leave a hole in his arm, so he asked the doctor how they were going to plug up the hole when they take the IV out. He was so worried about having a needle in his arm. I tried to explain to him that the needle is only in when they first put the IV in and then they take it out and leave only a tube. He was a little more comforted about having the IV. He was unable to walk or stand because when he did, his blood pressure dropped to a dangerous level. The doctor was very concerned. 

I told Max that God created our skin to be able to close up after they take the IV out. 

 Max's Awesome Thoughts

Max says, "If I was a General, I would have a dance before the war and then after the war we would have a party and hand out certificates and then release the people to go home."

"Mom, I don't want to talk about Malachi's mission or write about him because it's hard, 

because me and him were so close."

Area and State Special Olympics.

 Max competed in the Special Olympics Area meet in a rely race and a 25 meter race.

 

 Here is Max getting his gold medal for the rely race. He was so happy.

 

In October he completed in State Special Olympics swim meet. 

Max after he got his medals at State Special Olympics. 

Max getting ready to be in the Opening ceremonies parade

Max and Superman.

 

The lighting of the Torch Run. 

Highlight of the evening was the fireworks while singing "Eye of the Tiger."

 

In November we attended a fundraiser for Max's orchestra. 

Max played the viola while we ate the yummy breakfast.

His two aunts, niece, a my best girlfriend came along with his dad and I. He did a fabulous job.

 

Max playing his high school fundraiser.

Max and his Orchestra Teacher.

The Blessings Of Having A Teenager With Autism

Ten  Eleven Awesome Reasons Why Max Is Magnificent  

1.       He calls me on his bus ride home every day. He says, “Mom, I want to tell you something. I love you.”

2.       He never tries to lie or cheat. When I ask him a question he will answer truthfully even when he knows he did something wrong. It’s remarkable.

3.       He follows directions and obeys rules. A week ago, we were driving over to celebrate his Grandma’s birthday. We had a pot of chili in the back of the van. Max was asked by his father to unbuckle at the stop light to quickly check to see if the lid was still on the pot. Max response was,  "Dad I don’t want you to get a ticket and it’s not safe for me to unbuckle. Do you want me to die dad? I will die if I unbuckle and you will get a ticket from a policeman. Do you want me to have a funeral dad?” Max’s dad agreed and that was the end of the story. My other children would have jumped at the opportunity to unbuckle and check the food.  For the next 15 minutes Max kept explaining that he felt bad that he can’t disobey the rules.

4.       He always has a smile and loves to laugh at whatever is being said.

5.       He will ask the most unique questions. “Mom what does nude mean?” After he is told what the definition for nude is. He has a comeback with… “So when you shower you are nude and when you have clothes on you are ude.” Everyone got a kick out of it and Max invented a new word. “Ude”.  Max is so cleaver.

6.       Max is affectionate. He will put his arm around me at church and hold my hand. He loves to give hugs. When he was little the only way to get him to sleep was to roll him tight in a heavy blanket and rock him. He loved being held tight.

7.       Every night he likes me to tuck him in bed and turn the light off. He will wrap his baby blanket (I made the blanket when he was little) around his head when he is sleeping.

8.       He tries to keep up with practicing the viola and reading scriptures. We started reading the Doctrine and Covenants a week before school to give him a head start for seminary. It’s a requirement for the school year for him to read this book. After school started he came home and said, “I have to read Joseph Smith History before I can read anything else.”

9.       When we went to meet the teacher night at school the math teacher and the seminary teacher said Max loves to talk. I was shocked because when Max was little he was non-verbal until the age of five. He had no language and was not able to express anything he needed or wanted. The only way I could figure out what he needed was when he banged his head on the floor or screamed. What a blessing it is that he is able to use words and express what he wants and needs. He has come a long way and now he tells me he loves me. I cried the first time he said Mom.

10.   There are so many other awesome things about having a teenager with autism and I will continue to share them. Max has been a source of strength to many people including me. He has been a light and an example of how I should strive to be. Thank you Max for letting me be your mother.

11.   One last thing…I have been blessed with four other amazing children, two son in laws, one daughter in law and three grandchildren. My magnificent grandson has autism and has been an added strength to our family and to me.  Max loves his nephew and enjoys being with him. Max understands that they both have been blessed with learning to cope with having autism. I asked Max a week ago how does it feel to have autism and he said, “Mom it’s hard, it’s so hard. People don’t understand me.”

 Max at Camp Lo Mia